Through the Journey of Loss
Accepting the loss of people we love, is never easy. Whether it happens suddenly, or we have a bit of time to come to terms to a reality we would like to escape from, the pain of let our loved ones go is, often, difficult to manage.
We all experience some kind of loss at some point in life, and often it’s hard to know how to handle it.
Understanding bereavement and grief
Bereavement is the state of loss. Grief is the emotional response to that loss.
Bereavement is the experience of losing someone important to us. It is the period of mourning and adjustment that follows a loss. It can be emotionally devastating whether it’s the loss of a partner, a family member or a friend.
Grief is the emotional response to loss, which can include emotions like sadness, anger, guilt or even relief.
Bereavement is an inevitable part of the human experience, yet it remains one of the most challenging phases of life. The process of bereavement is deeply personal and varies widely from one person to another.
Feelings of grief can also happen because of other type of losses or changes in circumstances. For example: the end of a relationship, the loss of a job, moving away to a new location, a decline in the physical or mental health of someone you care about, distressing world events.
The five Stages of Grief
The grieving process is often described through the five stages, as identified by psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross in her book “On Death and Dying” (1969). These stages are not linear, so they not necessarily follow a particular order and include:
- Denial: The initial shock and disbelief, where the mind struggles to accept the reality of the loss.
- Anger: Feelings of frustration and helplessness, often directed toward oneself, others, or even the deceased.
- Bargaining: A stage where one might dwell on “what if” scenarios, hoping to reverse the situation.
- Depression: Profound sadness and despair as the reality of the loss becomes more apparent.
- Acceptance: Gradual acknowledgment of the loss, accompanied by a sense of peace and a focus on moving forward.
People may move back and forth between them or experience some stages more intensely than others.
The Impact of Bereavement
Some people may feel lots of different emotions at the same time, or their feelings may change quickly. It can be confusing at times.
In my personal experience, there’s no right or wrong way to feel. Indeed, bereavement affects individuals in multiple ways, emotionally, physically, socially, and spiritually:
- Emotional Impact: Feelings of sadness, anger, guilt, and loneliness are common during bereavement. For some, the intensity of these emotions can lead to depression or anxiety.
- Physical Impact: Grief can manifest physically through symptoms such as fatigue, insomnia, loss of appetite, and even weakened immune responses.
- Social Impact: Bereavement can alter relationships. Some individuals may withdraw from social interactions, while others might seek support from friends and family. There may also be a shift in roles, particularly in a family setting, as individuals adjust to life without the deceased.
- Spiritual Impact: For many, the loss of a loved one brings questions of faith and the meaning of life. Some may find comfort in their spiritual beliefs, while others might experience a crisis of faith.
Coping with Bereavement
Coping with bereavement is a deeply personal process, but certain strategies can help individuals navigate their grief.
Here some options which I personally found helpful and comforting:
- Seek Support: Sharing the burden of grief with others—whether through family, friends, or support groups—can be incredibly healing. Professional counselling or therapy is also beneficial, particularly for those that prefer to talk about their feelings with someone not directly involved, instead of a family member or a friend.
- Allow Yourself to Grieve: It’s essential to give oneself permission to feel the full range of emotions that come with loss. Suppressing these emotions can prolong the grieving process.
- Create Rituals and Memorials: Engaging in rituals, such as holding a memorial service or creating a tribute to the deceased, can provide a sense of closure and help preserve the memory of the loved one.
- Practice Self-Care: Maintaining physical and emotional well-being during bereavement is crucial. This includes eating well, getting enough rest, and engaging in activities that bring comfort.
- Embrace the Process: Grief has no set timeline. It’s important to be patient with oneself and recognize that healing is a gradual process. Accepting that it’s okay to have good days and bad days can make the journey more manageable.
Conclusion: Embracing the grieving process
Having to accept the loss of people we love and care for is hard.
We all know that it’s part of life and yet, no matter how prepared we think we might be for that moment, losing someone or something we love creates a variety of emotions, some of which will take time to understand and accept.
I too had to face grief and one thing that it’s clear to me now is that the journey through loss can be much longer than I would have imagined and there is not a timeline by when it’s going to be over. It is a challenging process to experience with patience and an open mind.
Bereavement is a profound experience that reshapes our understanding of life and death. While it brings intense pain, it also offers an opportunity for growth, reflection, and a deeper appreciation for the connections we share with others. By understanding the grieving process and embracing the support available, it might take time, but it is possible to find the path through the sorrow, ultimately reaching a place of acceptance and peace.
If grief is affecting your life, do not hesitate to contact me @ mctherapylondon@gmail.com for a personalized consultation. Together we can face this difficult journey.
For more tips and articles on emotional well-being, please visit my website @ https://www.mariacau.com/blog/
You can also find me in Instagram
@ https://www.instagram.com/mc.therapy/
